Tag Archive for self doubt

YOUR LIMITATIONS LOVE YOU: DO YOU LOVE THEM?

Too often people try to hide what the feel are their shortcomings or limitations.  They are viewed as weaknesses or things that put us at disadvantage but the only thing that makes them a hindrance to us is when we don’t acknowledge them and learn from them.

By acknowledging and respecting your limitations you will find that the parameters your limitations set for you will also

lead you to your gifts and opportunities.

Everyone has limitations, and you will find anyone who is successful spends as much time learning about their limitations as they do their gifts.  Sometimes more.

By acknowledging your limitations does not mean you’re being limited by them. Actually it’s the opposite, by knowing your limitations you become empowered and it helps you go in search of your true strengths rather than trying to fake you are good at something when, in reality at this point in time, it is not yours to have.

Our limitations are not going to go away just because you want them too.  The old quote “ I don’t’ know I don’t’ care, I can’t’ see it so it isn’t’ there” just does not work, at least in this instance. 

I actually prefer:  “sometimes your windshield and sometimes you’re the bug,” but what is neat about this is as humans, the times when we re the bug, if we KNOW WE ARE THE BUG we can avoid those windshields!

The more you ignore your limitations the more you become limited by them.

Whenever you take on something in life, you need to look at the situation honestly, taking in to consideration your strengths and your limitations when it comes to succeeding at the task.

Now by accepting your limitations is by no means my telling you to not do things.  What I am saying is acknowledge your limitations and do the things in such a way that you set yourself up to win not to fail.

This is shown to you all the time in people with physical challenges who are still climbing mountains, reaching success in areas that others would think they have no place even trying to succeed in.

WHY ARE THESE PEOPLE ABLE TO ACCOMPLISH SUCH FEATS?

By accepting their limitations and making the accommodations so they work for them.

As an example, I recently counseled someone who called me for advice about an opportunity they had come across but it was on his boss’s dime and was questioning whether to keep it secretly or go tell his boss.  Others had told this person “ go in and demand that he give you at least a third of what he makes,  that’s fair, it was your lead,”  sound advice maybe if you are Rambo,  but this person wasn’t’ Rambo. 

They weren’t the courageous and aggressive type personality and his boss was.  Realistically, there was no way he would be able to stand up to his boss, who was a tough guy, and stand his ground when his boss pushed back.  It seemed fine to give him the guidance to go in demand he got a cut of the opportunity because he found it, but realistically, he did not have the personal make up to do that successfully:  that was his limitation and just by wanting it to be different was not going to make it happen.

So what was my guidance?  I told them to be honest with him as to what he felt he could successfully ask for from the boss.  The bottom line was the boss was top dog and that wasn’t’ going to change and this person was the employee so no matter how you cut it,  he wasn’t going to be able to demand anything and come away victorious.  By taking that action he could end up fired and lose the opportunity all together. Not to mention feeling beaten up and seeing themselves as a weakling when they weren’t.  They were someone who did not work with his limitations.

They were much better to go to the boss in a more submissive positioning, tell the boss about the opportunity and propose a third cut.  The chances of this kind of boss giving it to him was slim,  but by taking this approach his chances of getting something were a lot higher than what they would be if he went in and demanded that the boss give him a third and they would get to keep their job and their dignity.

Now is this fair: maybe not,  but it’s a fact,  those are the limitations of the situation and by acknowledging them and approaching accordingly,  they stand a much better chance coming away with something,  including his ego intact.

On closing note I say to you, embrace your limitations and instead of focusing on what they seemingly deny you look to where and what actions they are pushing us instead.